Dealing With Disappointment

by Anastasia Fermin, Sunshima blog writer

Disappointment is something that we all inevitably face. It can certainly be a challenge, especially when you have had your heart set on accomplishing a goal. Both children and adults experience some form of disappointment in one way or the other, and each person reacts differently to such an event. Some may become very distraught and affected while others maintain a level head. So, what should we do when things don’t go the way we expected?

Let Your Feelings Flow

When a small child is disappointed, they would naturally throw a tantrum, cry or scream. After their tantrum subsides, they are usually genuinely ready to move on from whatever made them upset. With this in mind, adults can learn a thing or two from toddlers. While grown-ups don’t throw tantrums of this nature, this doesn’t mean that they can’t ‘feel’ their feelings. For example, if you are disappointed and become angry, instead of bottling up your feelings, let it out. Do something constructive to blow off steam such as going for a run or engaging in vigorous exercise. After you’ve vented your emotions, you feel much lighter, and clear-minded which helps you to focus on what your next step should be. Journaling is also another great way to channel your emotions and get negativity out of your system.

Practice Acceptance

The pandemic has caused a lot of disappointment for many people who had certain goals and plans to achieve. For example, many had their wedding plans postponed due to lockdowns and restrictions, or had to cancel a holiday they had been looking forward to. While the circumstances that surround such disruptions are understandable and not anyone’s fault, it’s still hard to process and you can’t help but feel disappointed. Accepting the situation and allowing yourself time to ‘regroup’ is a path that you can strive for. Once you accept that things didn’t work out, you can then go back to the drawing board and channel your energy into adapting and changing your plans to suit.

Manage Your Expectations

Having expectations is a normal and healthy part of life. It’s when these expectations aren’t met that we are faced with conflict and disappointment. Setting realistic and achievable goals is one way to avoid any major disappointment. It’s perfectly fine to aim high, but also consider the pros and cons of every situation, especially during uncertain times such as a pandemic. This also allows you sufficient room to adapt to changes more seamlessly and still have a positive outcome, though it may be different to your initial vision.

Be Grateful

Challenges are a part of life and the ability to overcome them is something to be grateful for. At the end of the day, be thankful for life and the resources available to you no matter how small, which allow you to bounce back from disappointment. Taking disappointment in your stride and using it as an opportunity to do even better is a trait that we should all aim to nurture. This will help in leading a more fulfilling and healthier lifestyle.